feeling lost sad ????

haev you ever felt liek you just wanted to cry but the tears were not ready to fall yet? well my tears are ready:( i dont know what it could be maybe i am just really happy about tomorrow and praiz or just scared to see what can happen. i dont know i just know God has powerful things in mind. i just going to ball my eyes out tomorrow but i will make sure i am alone, i hate people to see my weakness! praiz tomorrow is like a church event me and a group of friends have together when worship,drama,lesson i cant wait/ also i dont do good alone just chiling at home by myself scares the crap out of me! i need to get over this. because when becca band gets big and goes on tour what will i do ( maybe i will be married by then lol) nope they are going places and i know it is going to be soon! God has a plan for her band!!!!!!!!!!!!!! for me i need to find his will for my life????? i want to know it so bad it kills me in side. i love so many things which one can it be to help his kingdom grow???????? i not know it bugs me well i am going to go so i can worship God so please pray for me love ya . it so hard being surrounding by people who have what you want:( i know i need to love my self but that my friend is so hard!!!!!!!!! love you i will keeep my head up i will !!!!!night guys